In an unprecedented event earlier this evening, Arnab Goswami, the Editor-In-Chief for Times Now, stayed silent for a full 5 seconds during News Hour, allowing his guests to speak, and sending the TRP ratings for the channel soaring through the roof. This shocking moment occurred while the usually chirpy Arnab was interviewing an expert panel of celebrities, regarding Borivali’s recent demand for statehood.
The news has been received with varied reactions from all over. Rajdeep Sardesai, from a competing news channel, said he’d like to maintain a dignified silence regarding this development, right after pointing out that the gimmick was ‘too low even by Arnab’s dwarfish standards’. Mahesh Bhatt called in earlier today from his mobile home parked permanently outside the offices of 24×7, saying that the news was provocative, communal and biased. He further demanded that the censor board be banned for this. When pointed out that the Censor Board had no role to play in this incident, he said that it was beside the point, and the censor board should be banned regardless. Throughout the telecon, Suhel Seth, seated beside Mr. Bhatt, kept shouting obsceneties. When asked to comment, he said that he was infuriated with the situation for no particular reason and threatened to go without a hair cut for a further six months.
The most candid response came from the expert panel itself. Apparently, they were flabbergasted that Arnab betrayed their trust on national television. As usual before News Hour, the panel had been briefed that absolutely no answers would be required from them throughout the program, since Arnab will keep questioning without pauses; their role was restricted to trying to fit in as many interjections and conjunctions (Whoa!, But, Ah!) in between to give the illusion of them actually having something to say. So, fifteen minutes into the program, Ms. Ameesha Patel was understandably embarrassed when she found herself forced to sing ‘Yeahhh lazy lazy lamhe…’ to Arnab’s question on her opinion on a federal government structure.
On the other side of the border, Pakistan Interior Minister, Mr. Rehman Malik, noted that this was a difficult time for Pakistan, and urged the citizens to be brave and help the nation to collective overcome these forces of evil. When reminded that it was the Times Now incident and not another bomb blast for which his reaction was being sought, he noted that this was a difficult time for Pakistan, and urged the citizens to be brave and help the nation to collective overcome the forces of evil.
Arnab himself chose to downplay the incident, pointing out that the magnitude of the incident had been blown out of proportions by the media. ‘I remember being silent for a full 6 seconds back in 1985 while honing my interviewing skills on my pet dog. That being said, I know that the people of India are dying for an answer. So, you can join us today on News Hour to find out WHY ARNAB PAUSED,’ said Arnab with his trademark authoritative voice, while leaning over the desk on one arm.
Note: All of this is obviously untrue. Arnab didn’t pause.
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